Pardon
the sound of that last word but couldn’t help take a spin on Gabriel
Garcia Marquez’s wonderful novel for this post. After all, what is it
that drives millions of people, so diverse across cultures and boundaries of
state, to come together and applaud and react to the silver screen in unison?
What makes them one if not an attitude that has been nurtured and nourished on
a regular dose of good old Bollywood cinema? And even cynics will have to agree
that in spite of both foreign and regional language films coming to the fore in
current times, the Hindi film industry does stand out not only in terms of the
sheer numbers- i.e the quantity of films and amount of moolah it makes but in
it’s unique ability to unite a nation of otherwise often disgruntled and
disjointed people. The only other thing that binds us similarly is
errr…corruption, yes, not even politics or cricket anymore.
Hindi films work for three reasons- no I am not going to say entertainment thrice, thank you very much. Although that was true of most films till small budget ‘thinking’ films started creating fissures in the tried and tested formula for a Bollywood blockbuster. So while once upon a time it took the powerful baton of art house cinema to crack the monopoly of commercial potboilers, today it is films made on a shoestring budget with potentially no star value that can strike a mean punch to the regular masala flick Bollywood is known for. Now that we have completed 100 years though, may be it is time to shed the excess baggage meaning those silly gimmicks our film fraternity loves sticking to like they all learnt filmmaking from the same rule book. Let me know if you disagree.
The Sequel Mania: You wouldn’t be wrong if you thought Bollywood has lost the plot. Because very often if a film does well, you can be sure that a sequel is in the making almost immediately. What beats the race is Dabangg 2 selling its television rights even before a single scene of the masterpiece is shot. But apart from the significant recall value, why can’t Bollywood get original ideas? More ranting on this in my next post.
The West Side Story: When not cashing in on a previous hit, we love to steal shamelessly. Just rip apart a great Hollywood flick scene by scene or borrow the basic plot, even better- call it an adaptation.
The Item Number: Ya, so the wolf howls and the owl hoots from the first four rows would have to go. But must every film pander to the cheap ritual of playing to the gullies and insert an item number when it is least expected or required? Even Malaika Arora has found an alternate profession by turning producer, it’s time we gave this trend a miss.
Woman on Top: Before you start getting ideas, I mean our female breed of actors have time and again proved that they can pull in the masses and classes even without the jhatkas and matkas. It’s time they got their due in terms of money, screen space and substantial roles. It would be such a refreshing change to see women play their age for starters.
Going Oscar Wild: It’s time we accepted that just because we think a film deserves international accolades, it isn’t going to hit bull’s eye. We have been rooting for that golden statuette for nearly a 100 years now, but can we stop salivating for it please?
American Pie: I know every film star this side of the sub continent would love to star in a Hollywood film but considering our desi actors almost always get a raw deal in every Amreekan film, I am afraid it’s time our film stars dumped their firangi agents.
The Guest Appearance: Yes, we love seeing our favourite actors on the red carpet at Cannes, BAFTA, Oscars et al but it is mighty embarrassing when the overseas press reports deride an actor’s clothes and pass ‘who is that’ sort of remarks. It doesn’t help when our glitterati chooses to put on more than just their best foot forward like a fake accent, wannabe smile and dab their heavily made up eyes at the non existent paparazzi. For all the Indian ‘exotica’ fervor that they exhibit, there is still a long way for Hollywood to respect us for what our film industry is worth. Anyone who saw A R Rahman’s ‘blink and you miss’ musical interludes at the Oscars will know what I am talking about.
The Publicity Overkill: If we have to imitate our Hollywood counterpart, we can probably take a page out of their PR book and understand how not to kill the excitement of watching a film by going on an information overdrive, making those inane TV appearances, giving countless interviews parroting the same promotional one liners and other shenanigans of the mandatory drill that a film release demands these days.
It’s time to celebrate a long and successful innings of the cinema we grew up watching- as kids, with parents, while dating, with our own kids…and so on and so forth. What a magnanimous century it has been and a salute is due to the Hindi cinema industry for treating us to such adrenaline pumping entertainment. It deserves all the accolades it is getting and if the new wave of filmmaking has its way, sure looks like the best is yet to come! Khush toh bahut hoge tum….hain?!
Hindi films work for three reasons- no I am not going to say entertainment thrice, thank you very much. Although that was true of most films till small budget ‘thinking’ films started creating fissures in the tried and tested formula for a Bollywood blockbuster. So while once upon a time it took the powerful baton of art house cinema to crack the monopoly of commercial potboilers, today it is films made on a shoestring budget with potentially no star value that can strike a mean punch to the regular masala flick Bollywood is known for. Now that we have completed 100 years though, may be it is time to shed the excess baggage meaning those silly gimmicks our film fraternity loves sticking to like they all learnt filmmaking from the same rule book. Let me know if you disagree.
The Sequel Mania: You wouldn’t be wrong if you thought Bollywood has lost the plot. Because very often if a film does well, you can be sure that a sequel is in the making almost immediately. What beats the race is Dabangg 2 selling its television rights even before a single scene of the masterpiece is shot. But apart from the significant recall value, why can’t Bollywood get original ideas? More ranting on this in my next post.
The West Side Story: When not cashing in on a previous hit, we love to steal shamelessly. Just rip apart a great Hollywood flick scene by scene or borrow the basic plot, even better- call it an adaptation.
The Item Number: Ya, so the wolf howls and the owl hoots from the first four rows would have to go. But must every film pander to the cheap ritual of playing to the gullies and insert an item number when it is least expected or required? Even Malaika Arora has found an alternate profession by turning producer, it’s time we gave this trend a miss.
Woman on Top: Before you start getting ideas, I mean our female breed of actors have time and again proved that they can pull in the masses and classes even without the jhatkas and matkas. It’s time they got their due in terms of money, screen space and substantial roles. It would be such a refreshing change to see women play their age for starters.
Going Oscar Wild: It’s time we accepted that just because we think a film deserves international accolades, it isn’t going to hit bull’s eye. We have been rooting for that golden statuette for nearly a 100 years now, but can we stop salivating for it please?
American Pie: I know every film star this side of the sub continent would love to star in a Hollywood film but considering our desi actors almost always get a raw deal in every Amreekan film, I am afraid it’s time our film stars dumped their firangi agents.
The Guest Appearance: Yes, we love seeing our favourite actors on the red carpet at Cannes, BAFTA, Oscars et al but it is mighty embarrassing when the overseas press reports deride an actor’s clothes and pass ‘who is that’ sort of remarks. It doesn’t help when our glitterati chooses to put on more than just their best foot forward like a fake accent, wannabe smile and dab their heavily made up eyes at the non existent paparazzi. For all the Indian ‘exotica’ fervor that they exhibit, there is still a long way for Hollywood to respect us for what our film industry is worth. Anyone who saw A R Rahman’s ‘blink and you miss’ musical interludes at the Oscars will know what I am talking about.
The Publicity Overkill: If we have to imitate our Hollywood counterpart, we can probably take a page out of their PR book and understand how not to kill the excitement of watching a film by going on an information overdrive, making those inane TV appearances, giving countless interviews parroting the same promotional one liners and other shenanigans of the mandatory drill that a film release demands these days.
It’s time to celebrate a long and successful innings of the cinema we grew up watching- as kids, with parents, while dating, with our own kids…and so on and so forth. What a magnanimous century it has been and a salute is due to the Hindi cinema industry for treating us to such adrenaline pumping entertainment. It deserves all the accolades it is getting and if the new wave of filmmaking has its way, sure looks like the best is yet to come! Khush toh bahut hoge tum….hain?!
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